Ok so, You all have been asking for it and here it is! Love advice from Madame B.! To begin this journey I've sorted through a bevy of questions, however, for me I think it's important, just like a good relationship, to try to get this Column off on a good foot.
Dear Madame B.
I've been dateless in NYC for about 6 years now. I've gone out -- but I haven't had one "real date" -- meaning not one interesting adventure with a Guy I actually like and who actually likes me. Mostly I've gone out with cute guys who've I've hooked up with, but it seems this is a as far as it gets... the guys here in NY only think of dating as "hooking up". And then I will find out that its not only me that they are hooking up with. It's sort of gross. What gives? My friends say that "it's NY!". Is that really just the way things are?
Hook Up Gal
Queens, NY
Dear H.U.G.,
Well yes. But NO! Meaning that's the way things CAN be here -- if you let it. My first advice is to stop the hook-up game. I mean you play it, but then you get depressed. So that tells me that you are not really enjoying it -- and well, if you aren't enjoying a hook-up.....????? Lets be honest: only paid members of a secret profession engage in hookups they don't enjoy. They do it because it's their job. So unless it is your job to engage in bad hookups, I say stop.
NYC is filled with a myriad of people all with their own little ideas of happiness. That is what makes this city great! And if your idea of happiness is to bed a guy you actually like, and who really likes you too, well the only thing you should do is stop bedding these guys you don't like, and WAIT. In the meantime you could always get a journal (a cute one) and ride the train, writing furiously as you wait for the magic moment to hit. In this manner you might just find your own Patrick Moberg.
Who is Patrick Moberg, you ask? Patrick Moberg is the gent who saw the woman of his dreams on the 5 train, created a website with cute drawings of her and himself in an effort to find her again -- and then did! YOU CAN SEE HIS WEBSITE RIGHT HERE! Now we have no idea how that story will end -- and I hope it ends with both parties alive! However, the way I see it is that at least this relationship has one helluva good start. I mean talk about great first impressions! Talk about a guy liking you!
Your particular story might not be this sticky-bun-sweet, but if you want a guy whose heart goes a patter for you, then you gotta stop going to bed with boys ya don't even like for free. It's not only bad business, but the frustration of this sort of arrangement will show through in your body language (i.e. the scowl upon your brow!) and will keep any guy that actually does like you at a distance because they will read your pissy-ness! And I don't know one man worth his mettle who is gonna knowingly take on a pissy gal! So far you've been entertaining men who YOU don't even enjoy and guess who pays for that? You do! I say send those gents a bill immediately and move onto someone you don't have to charge. With millions of boys in this city, you can't tell me that there is NO ONE out there. They are out there -- but right now, they are with the happy gal on the train!
Pull up those stockings &Get Happy!
Madame B.
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